and they say love is blind
A quick, probably unfulfilling explanation -- "in realtime" thoughts/actions from last night in italics, relapses into memory in normal font. Cheers.
In my eyes I can feel the sleep
Just beginning to set in, long overdue
One at a time, right then left
The contacts come out gently
And I remember the way you kissed each eyelid
In the same manner
I put on my barely imperceptibly large glasses
With a steady gaze into the mirror
Shaking my head and wondering
Why I had made such a fuss
Over you seeing me in them
--I could simply slip them off
As you did yours when you knew
That I was ready and comfortable
To use my stronger senses with you
Smell, touch, taste, sound--
Pulling off my daily wear
Slipping into an oversized long sleeved shirt
And crawling into bed
Head hits the pillow, eyes slowly close
The scent of fresh laundry from the shirt
Fills my nose, triggers my memory
Of your long-sleeved shirt that smelled the same
But with a hint of you lingering
--Something you loaned me for a brief period when I was cold
But whose logical use was rendered unnecessary
As you wrapped yourself around me to warm me and calm my trembles--
Eyes grow heavy as a curtain falls
I remove my glasses and place them on the nightstand
--As you did yours as we lay on bed
Covers neatly placed, chatting away about life
Until talking became insignificant
20/20 a simple detail
We leaned in to embrace, to kiss
To experience life instead of discussing it
Every sense heightened, intensity growing
You are close enough to see perfectly
Everything else fades into the background
Except your eyes, your lips
The smell of your hair, your aftershave
The sound as we breathed in each other
The touch of your hands, the weight and feel of your body against mine
The taste of your mouth, your tongue--
I've lost myself in you again
Eyes shut, and I'm dreaming about it
For the millionth time
late night/early morning ramble
Which verb would you believe?
Respect, admire, like, miss, want, need, love, complete...am.
They're all true.
But you wouldn't know
Because I've said only some of them to you before.
I say them all now with little hope
That they should fall upon ears
That have not grown weary
Of someone who cannot make up her mind,
Someone who cannot voice what she feels,
Someone who never learned to open herself up
Until just recently,
When it is too late,
Too emotional,
Too painful,
Too futile,
To keep wishing that she could express herself now in the past
Too scared then to lay everything bare
To expect nothing in return
Save ears that would hearken to something that was new then
Something very real and very of the moment
I chose to whisper then
I decided to declare now
But the words fade to whispers
As you walk away toward better things.